Thursday, August 30, 2012

Frequently Asked, Never Answered

St. Benedict and his twin
sister St. Scholastica
I'm often asked some variation on the question:

How much harder is handling twins than handling one?

I put any question that is remotely related to this one in the same category. My honest answer: I have no idea.

Truly. I have no idea. Because I don't know any different. I can imagine, but that isn't reality because I haven't been there. Those conversations are always so funny. Not just to me, but also to the person I'm speaking with. I think people are so fascinated by twins that they ask this (or something similar) of me and then realize what they have asked me. You know the feeling, right? As soon as the words leave your mouth you think, "Duh!" I know, believe me! I do it frequently. So of course we all end up getting a big laugh out of it.

However if I were to imagine life with twins after a singleton I would have to say that yes, I think handling twins would feel more challenging. I have a friend who has a son and is currently pregnant with twins. I may have to ask her and then start using her answers when I get this question. But for me, this is just what life with kids has always been like, there has always been two of them.

When I did that local radio interview a few months back one of the questions I was asked was my advise for someone having twins. It's not exactly the same question, but sort of a close cousin to it. I feel like I tripped over the question a bit and my mind blanked for a second. The only thing that popped into my head was being organized. It felt silly saying it and I think my interviewer was a little lost on how to follow up on that one. I don't blame him, I would be too. Heck, he has seven kids, he and his family probably need more organization than I do with my two. But what can you do. Radio. Live. No editing. There you have it.

Here's the thing, though. I have no advise. Yeah, yeah, I know, I'm lame. But honestly, I am just like any first time mom. I truly know nothing. I'm learning as I go. And really, I'm discovering, that is what parenthood is all about. Yep, just one big trial and error. It's a miracle kids can grow up to be normal adults at all.

So in the end, I never answer this question. I can't answer this question, though I know some people who can or will be able to one day. I'm happy to direct you to those individuals. ::smile::

The question I would love to answer for you one day: What is it like having one after having twins? One day, hopefully, God will gift us with the ability to answer that question.

Just not quite yet. I'm still enjoying my two.


  1. ah yes, I had 7 children in 10 yrs. after the first 2 who were only 14 mos apart I got the "How do you do that?" question all the time. I just looked at them and said, "You just do".
    what else would be right?

  2. "You just do."

    Exactly! Very wise words. I've sometimes said something along those same lines.